Here is the link from the "twins 4 twins site. But I'll also copy it in it's entirety below.
Nature's Thumbprint: the new genetics of personality; was written by a father and son team. The father Dr. Neubauer used twins separated at birth as the basis of his studies and after studying them for over 40 years co wrote this book with his son who is a writer. It talks about how we are all born with a certain set of characteristics as evidenced by the twins studies, (ie- twins having a lot of similarities even though they were raised apart) but how even identical twins can develop differently when raised apart. Really interesting read if you like that sort of thing. Written in common english not technical jargon so it's relatively easy to understand.
The next book is a memoir written by two female twins who a part of that study. It's called, "Identical Strangers". It follows the twins on there rediscovery of each other in their mid-thirties, and chronicles their journey. It's written in a narrative, interestingly though, the twins take turns writing about the same periods of time and their own personal reflections. It's obviously more of a personal story and easier to relate to.
As for my own experience being a twin, I related to both the books quite strongly. I was finishing Nature's Thumbprint on a plane back from Hawaii with my twin brother, and kept having him read sections as they became relevant.
My brother and I were probably more typical than either one of us, or anybody likes to think, that they are. We were very close growing up, but fought all the time. Then we found girlfriends and rarely spoke nearly as much after that. It seems that when you are close enough with someone that you rely on them and become dependent, it's difficult to break out of that mold in your next serious relationships, brothers or otherwise.
Does anybody else feel this way?
People ask us all the time if we can feel each others pain, or simply if we are even twins. We have prefab answers that we usually use on occasion. We do have what we call a 'twintuition'. But it's really something that you would have with anyone you are close with. Sensing if they are in trouble or harms way. Or if they are experiencing the same seasonal effective symptoms with the loss of daylight and the coming of winter.
I reflect upon it less now that I did when I was growing up, but feel that being a twin is an interesting way to exist. I always knew what it was to be so close with another person to communicate without words, and know exactly what they were thinking with a glance. I guess growing up with so many of the same influences, can only lead to similar thought patterns throughout life. But as we've grown up, we've succeeded in developing a stronger sense of identity.
We're now both 28, and ready to be friends again. We aren't so fiercely fighting for independence. I always knew that this day would come, but we both had to be ready. It's something we always wanted to have back, but we were both going in different directions and to acknowledge the others' gains was to smite are own. I now think that knowing who we are as individuals gives us more confidence in accepting each other.
Thanks for reading this blog.
Please feel free to write me or post comments here.
No comments:
Post a Comment